PICTURE PERFECT

The Frame.

Imagine your life as a piece of art. The frame consists of your personality, your physical characteristics, and your gifts and abilities. It’s probably no news to anyone that many women, instead of thanking God for the frame He’s given them, spend their time trying to change it.

I once read a revealing story about such a woman. She was not satisfied with the frame God built for her. She was sure her physical and emotional disabilities, her lack of abilities, were a cross she had to bear. She wished she could choose another frame.

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SA PANGALAWANG PAGKAKATAON

Nanginginig akong nakatayo sa malaking lumang pintuan. Kabado. Namumutil ang pawis. Pero ito na to. Ito na talaga at wala na itong atrasan pa.

Unti-onti ng bumubukas ang malaking lumang pintuan sa aking harapan. Yumuko akong nakangiti kahit nanginginig. Kasaba’y nito, ay dahan-dahan ko namang iniangat ang masayang mukha ko.

Bukas na ang pintuan. Nakangiti akong naluluha sa saya. Hindi ko maipaliwanag. Basta.

Nagtataka. Nanlaki ang aking mga mata.

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ILANG ARAW

Dalawang oras at kalahati na lamang ang natitira, alas dose na. Yung sa dami ng aking ginagawa, ni hindi ko man lang naisip na batiin ka.

Isang minuto ang nakalipas, nang isulat ko yung unang talata na naisip ko. Ang bilis ng oras. Sobrang bilis. Gusto kong habulin pero imposible. Pero, bakit ko hahabulin ang oras? May dapat ba kong balikan? Panghinayangan? May dapat ba akong itama at gawin na hindi ko nagawa? Alam ko wala. Sigurado ako wala.

Hindi ko pa man nasisimulan isulat ang hindi ko alam kung tula ba ito o isang uri ng kwento, nalulungkot na ako. Naluluha.

Apat na pu’t apat na araw na lang…

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MARRY HIM (BECAUSE HE’S REAL). SO REAL.

Perhaps you are magical. Perhaps you already know it. I’m not sure about that, but I do know that you are so real.

Marry a Man who knows you are both.

A Man who can navigate the wild tangle of your mind, past the castle it builds and around the mythical creatures it conceives, to pursue the truth beneath your story.

A Man who can kiss you both tenderly and fiercely. Whose hands you can trust to know your every freckle and fold and to hold you as you shudder with ecstasy or with grief. A man who can magic away all hurts for your children with those same lips, and teach the ultimate art of fort – building with those same hands.

A Man who anchors you.

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MY NEVER-ENDING TO DO LIST:

  1. Take something you’ve never done before
  2. Smile at stranger
  3. Plant vegetables
  4. Go on a vacation
  5. Have a lunch with old friends
  6. Ride a bike
  7. Take Zumba class
  8. Run 21k
  9. Save money in advance
  10. Write a real love letter (For soon-to-be-the-one)
  11. Frame my works (Portrait, Paintings, Illustrations)
  12. Travel alone somewhere at least overnight
  13. Have a family portrait taken
  14. Don’t complain about anything for a week
  15. Make a list of 50 things that make me smile
  16. Get a full body massage
  17. Go watch a concert
  18. Have a candlelight dinner (With someone special of course!)
  19. Spend afternoon reading at the park
  20. Read at least one book every month
  21. Create an inspiration board
  22. Wear bikini
  23. Try new hairstyle, haircut
  24. Apply for a passport
  25. Make your own business
  26. Fall in love
  27. Dance in the rain (Wearing a dress)
  28. Take a solo trip somewhere
  29. Be a volunteer
  30. Go on a date (No serial date please…)
  31. Watch sunrise and sunset (same time, same place)
  32. Take pictures
  33. Do a DIY Projects
  34. Make videos
  35. Go to the zoo
  36. Buy a sewing machine
  37. Learn to play guitar
  38. Take dressmaking class
  39. Get engaged
  40. Leave sticky notes with Bible verses (In public places)
  41. Read Bible
  42. Create an account (For better future)
  43. Take Mama somewhere (Its payback time)
  44. Buy a sofa
  45. Fly a kite
  46. Sleep under the stars
  47. Climb a mountain
  48. Watch classic movies
  49. Hug a tree and take a picture
  50. Sail a boat
  51. Cheongsando, Island
  52. Wicklow National Park, Ireland
  53. Adopt a dog
  54. Travel
  55. Draw a portrait with love
  56. Spend whole day on a beach
  57. Make Mama proud

I WAS AFRAID BEFORE I MET YOU

You saw my heart lying on the floor.

She was battered.

Hairline fractures, deep breaks, and bloody scabs covered the sunny sequins on her hot pink skins.

She was scared, trembling alone in a vulnerable dark corner.

You knew this.

But you swooped down, picked her up with silken hands and kissed her so softly.

You warmed her wounds in the sun beans of your sweet embrace and saw gold in the bloody folds and dark valleys of her shame.

You showed her that gold.

You showed me that gold.

You encourage me, inspired me, lifted me out of a hellish half-life, and introduced me to my self.

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